#realdoctor

Though he actually finishes June 30, this weekend we had the graduation events for Peter's residency program. On Friday we and the other three graduating chiefs and their spouses/parents had dinner at the department chair's house, and Saturday we had the graduation dinner with the whole department and invited guests - so great both his parents and mine could join us to celebrate the end of this final step in the long becoming a doctor process.

Celebrating seems a bit surreal, though, as there were so many long days when it seemed like the end would never arrive, but it also seems shocking that it's already been almost a whole year since I wrote about the start of this final year of residency...

Peter has worked really hard to get to this point, in terms of both hard work/dedication and vast quantities of time spent at the hospital, and I'm really proud of him for it all. It's weird to not be able to actually see your spouse do their job well (not exactly appropriate - or desirable! - for me to visit him in the operating room and observe his skills), but I know from all his hard work and studying and smarts that he has trained to be a darn good doctor and he is going to be SO good at his job. So if you're ever in need of a friendly ENT to sort out some ear, nose, or throat issues, I've got your guy!

Overall, it's been quite the five years. I've both cursed residency and loved it for all the hard times (and more recently, solo parenting) it has meant but also for the amazing opportunities and people the circumstances of being in a residency program have brought to our lives. Thanks to residency we've had a chance to live in a great city we'd probably never otherwise have chosen (thank you match process), cried over horrible hours and tough months, felt at times that our lives were put on hold by the bad hours/low pay yet also had some of the biggest and best life progressions and transitions (hello, baby!) during this time, and learned/grown up a lot.

Residency graduation is definitely the end of an era - even just being married to a resident has defined my life enough that it partially inspired my blog name - that really began many moons ago, starting with four years of medical school. So with this graduation we've got major transitions both for Peter professionally and for us as a family: a first real job for Peter, a move, a new house - and figuring out what our life and routines as a family are when there's finally a little more time available in it. So, like real adulthood. It's hard to leave what you're familiar with, but there are exciting things ahead! (More about what residency life is like and on making it through here, if you're interested.)

First things first though is enjoying Peter's final vacation week of residency. The best advice we received about going through residency as a couple was to ignore the medical school loans occasionally and make sure to take quality vacations together when he did get time off - those weeks have been some highlights in our past years. This time around we have to start working on packing, but we also get to take a little Cincinnati last hurrah staycation while Hendrik is with his grandparents. Every restaurant we ever wanted to try, here we come!

one year

Today marks the beginning of Peter's 5th year of residency... which means we're one year away from being done, and thus one year away from moving back to our home town in Michigan.

Residency has been difficult on both of us in a lot of ways, and this last year comes with more responsibility (and thus more work hours and more stress!) for Peter, but I'm still feeling a sad for how quickly the year will probably fly by, and a little nostalgic already about our time in Cincinnati. We'll really miss this city and all the great things we've fallen in love with here: our first house, our friends, our favorite restaurants, the milder winters and springs, the proximity to so many things I love but Holland doesn't have (Trader Joes, Ikea, Whole Foods, Crate & Barrel. Even Chipotle!).

And I admit I also feel a little cliche, being married to my high school sweetheart and moving back to our hometown. But we're also excited to be close to our families, for the great job opportunity Peter has there, and for all the new friends, experiences, restaurants, and activities that we'll discover as we settle back into a place that we know well but haven't lived in for years now. Oh, and to live close to the beach in the summer again - so excited about that.

Moving to a city for residency is kind of interesting - you get to choose which cities/residency programs are on the rank list that you submit, but the match process ultimately decides for you which one you'll end up in. It's such a big unknown, going in to that Match Day in March, which I found so stressful: there were 8 cities we could have ended up in, and with one opening of an envelope suddenly the location of our next 5 years was mandated. But it also has its excitement: it was a great time in our lives to try out a new city, to explore a little farther afield from where we grew up, to develop a new set of relationships and hobbies in a new place.

The other interesting thing about moving to a city for residency is that most of the people we know best here are also residents or spouses of residents, so we've all settled into this new city together as transplants and transients. It's great to know people with shared current experiences and varied past experiences - but I'm also reminded, when I have fleeting thoughts of maybe making Peter break his contract in Michigan so we can stay because I'm going to miss it so much, that many of our friends will be moving on at the same time, so it would hardly feel like the same city any more if we were to stay. The end of residency is quite a transition point in many ways.

The experience of moving at the completion of residency will be so much different than how it all started - Peter actually accepted this job last September, so by the time we move we'll have known for nearly two years the location of our next move. And of course we also know the city itself, having lived there for many years and still visiting our families there with some frequency. It'll still feel new in a lot of ways, given how long it's been since we graduated from high school and moved away for college - and given that now we're a family of three! Our Ohio-made baby is soon to be a Michigan-raised boy... And as much as we've enjoyed our time here in Ohio, as a Michigan-raised girl, I'm happy about that. 

Sharing on Medical Mondays. Photos by Jacqueline Vollat from our photo shoot in May.

weekend-ing

It almost felt like one of those early-residency weekends to me - his weekend schedule has finally been lighter in the past 6-9 months, but for this 3-month rotation Peter has to go in to round on half the weekends, plus set up daily OR schedules and put together weekly case conference presentations (on top of the rather late weekday evenings). So I was on my own for most of Saturday and Sunday while he worked on all of the above (and both of my usual gym/brunch/shopping buddies were out of town), falling back on my excellent residency spouse skills of entertaining myself...

Here are all the things I was up to (I kept busy!):

taste testing: our big Friday night excitement was a trip to Kroger to pick out his & hers pints of ice cream. I think my Ben & Jerry's half baked was the winner (yum).

celebrating: my pregnancy buddy Katie's baby girl at a fun shower hosted by other Cincinnati blogger buddy Sarah. I was excited for an excuse to pick out a girly outfit - and I kind of want to wear this shirt and leggings myself!

spinning: did my usual Saturday morning class - and am liking it even more now with my official spinning shoes.

nesting: starting in on reorganization with lots of bins/boxes in other rooms of the house so that I can get everything out of the guest room and make it into a nursery! Unfortunately I'm still at the worse-before-better stage in the basement, guest room, and my office.

packing: my trusty rolling duffel to head to DC today for an editors' conference (which means I can cross off #4 on my 30 before 30 list for a second time!).

crafting: something fun with lots of embroidery floss - stay tuned for the results tomorrow!

reading (aka sunning on the back deck on a perfect afternoon): really enjoying Life after Life, from my summer reading list, so far.

Peter and I had some yummy summer favorite dinners (fish tacos, mini lamb burgers, takeout - ha) to enjoy together in the evenings, and much as I would have liked to see more of him and am thankful that at this point in residency it's not as normal for him to be THIS busy (just have to get through these 3 months), I didn't entirely mind some extra set-my-own schedule time - I'm pretty good at entertaining myself after 4 years of medical school and 3 of residency, and clearly I've got lots of weekend things to do here.

How do you entertain yourself on a weekend on your own?

Sharing on Medical Mondays.

making it through residency: things they don't tell you

Today is the first day of Peter's fourth year of residency - three years down, two to go! I say it every time we hit a milestone: some of the days (and months) feel really long on the tougher rotations, but overall, time seriously flies, and despite those bad days, residency is really a great time in our lives.

Of course, I've learned a lot about residency from the perspective of a spouse in the meantime, which certainly helps in coping. I don't know who "they" are, but here are some things I think they should have filled me in on earlier - so I'll pass on the wisdom I've acquired, for those spouses of interns just starting off today (along with my 5 pieces of advice from last year):

1. There's still studying: you think it ends with medical school, but there are still lectures and journal articles to read and boards to take, so Peter still winds up staying up way later than he should on plenty of days.

2. You're not done "investing": there's no more tuition, but it's still going to cost a lot more $$ to become an official doctor... there's still Step 3 to pay for, supplies to buy, medical licensing fees, and so on. (Blerg.)

3.  Less free doctoring than you'd expect: residents forget pretty much everything from medical school unrelated to their specialty. It doesn't take long, and is rather annoying for my bouts with hypochondria.

4. You get to go on vacation: thus far in our residency career, dual income, no kids, and 4 weeks off per year in Peter's program = vacation happiness.

5. Friday night does not count as part of the weekend: actually this probably should be lesson #1 - would have saved me some irritation on a few certain Fridays as I scrubbed bathrooms for lack of anything more exciting to do while waiting for Peter to finally get done with a case).

6. You'll miss those medical school hours, but you won't miss medical school: seriously, fourth year of medical school especially seems soooo light and easy in comparison, but residency is still so much better from both of our perspectives. Maybe because it feels a lot more like real life than waiting to get out of student-hood.

7. They get good at one thing besides doctor stuff: one of the main skills residents learn is how to fall asleep on a dime, or any time they recline on a couch. (But this has become much less necessary as Peter's schedule has gradually improved in the later residency years!)

8. It goes so fast: and you should love your life in the meantime, because it really is a great one.

Here's to two more great years before it's time for the next stage!

Sharing on Medical Mondays.

March in review

I always want to come up with something funny for April Fool's day, but I'm a terrible practical joker. So why don't we just stick with a little March recap.

The month in Instagramming:

The month in thinking positively about residency (because while this 3-month rotation has really started to wear on us, if you can't say anything nice...):

• Highlighting the bonuses: five perks about being married to a resident
• Remembering good things to come: counting down the days to the April through June research rotation!
• Getting a break: a whole week together in the sun always helps with an attitude adjustment

The month in weathering the unseasonably cold weather:

• Escape: a week in Punta Cana and a mental health day
• Pretend: bringing spring colors into the house and onto my iPhone, since the outdoors wouldn't cooperate
• Avoidance: several days of simply not leaving the house

The month in watching stuff:

• Netflix instant: Parenthood (just finished all the episodes available so need something new to start - suggestions?)
• Movies: Skyfall
• Sports: March Madness!

The month in blogging:

• Most visited post: how do I love thee: bubble necklace
• Most commented on post: pros of being married to a resident
• Days skipped posting: four. And I decided to just be okay with that.

As alluded to above, around here we're welcoming April especially heartily, as Peter starts the best 3-month rotation in all of residency: research!

He has a couple of research projects to work on and gets to do some operating in cases he's interested in, but basically it's a freebie 3 months in which he can do things like actually get to the gym, be home on time for dinner every day, and even take some 3-day weekends... Basically a once in his working lifetime opportunity. And it's especially great coming off of 3 months at the children's hospital, for which he has to get up in the 4s and I can count on one hand the number of times he's come home before 7. It's been a long one.

Yay, April! What good things is this month bringing to your household?

Sharing on Medical Mondays.

pros of being married to resident

How was your weekend? Peter got to spend all day Saturday taking the annual in-service exam for ENT residents (I spent it more enjoyably, running a 10k and having brunch with friends). It's nice he has this out of the way now - for a chunk of the year it takes up Wednesday nights for review sessions, and then of course there's this Saturday that suddenly is no longer a day off. Another example of how, in residency, your time is not so much your own...

But having a resident for a spouse isn't all about bad hours, like I sometimes make it sound. For Medical Monday, how about few of the perks of having a resident in the family:

1. Useful skills: with his surgical training, Peter's a pretty good sewer now, so he knows how to do helpful things like darn his own socks. And he once trussed a chicken with a surgical needle/thread. Also, apparently labs are prone to ear infections, so he's obviously the perfect member of this household to clean out and dry those Ginger ears after bath time.

2. Useful supplies: access to hospital items can be handy, like the gloves and masks Peter brought home for protection from harsh chemicals when I deglossed the cabinets for painting. Also, the lint-free cloths from the OR have come in handy for a zillion things (apparently they open tons of packages of these, only use a few, and dispose of the rest... so I'll take 'em!).

3. (Occasionally) helpful hours: those seemingly terrible work hours occasionally are actually helpful; for instance, Peter was working in the middle of the night last September and could order our new iPhones right when they came available, while everyone else had to wait weeks longer to get theirs after the first batch sold out.

4. Entertainment/stories to impress at a party: while some of the day's stories can be too squeam-inducing, often they can be quite entertaining. Like the one about a guy who aspirated an entire fish that was still alive.

5. Bragging rights: much as I still find it a bit unfathomable, it really is kind of awesome that my husband spends his days doing surgery on people. I don't actually go around bragging about that, but it's sometimes tempting. Because it's a cool fact.

Also, I have to add that are a few perks you think you might get, but they turn out not to be true, most notably: you think you're going to get all this free medical advice, but be warned - residents apparently forget everything from medical school aside from whatever they've specialized in. If I've got a sore throat, okay, but if my foot hurts or my hypochondriac "I think I have a tumor" syndrome surfaces, I'm out of luck.

So do you reap any benefits from your spouse's profession?


Sharing on Medical Mondays, hosted by Emma, Jane, Heather, & Mandy.

7 years, and on being married into medicine

Peter and I started dating our junior year in high school, and when we got married 5 years later, I thought about how much we had changed and grown up in that time, but happily in ways that were compatible. Now it's kind of funny to think back on that, especially seeing our baby faces in wedding photos, because 7 years after our wedding, we have changed and grown up so much more - and still in compatible ways. (I realize in another 7 I'll look back and think how young we were now!)

Another thing I remember thinking when we got married, 6 months before Peter started medical school: how looonng it seemed like it would be before he finished the process and became a "real" doctor, and how old we would be at that point. There were lots of worries too: Would we ever get to see each other? Would we have to move far away from our families for school/residency? Could we ever afford to travel together before turning 40? 

But how fast it's gone! Just 2.5 years of residency left - and we're totally not old yet (right?). And how much I love our life, and the many places we've traveled.

To be honest, sometimes being married to a doctor isn't all it's cracked up to be (or whatever the people who used to say to me in Peter's first couple of months of medical school, "ooooh, you're going to be a doctor's wife and go to country clubs and things!" thought it was), at least if you marry him before med school... There are bad hours and stress and expensive licensing exams. The doctor-in-training process has dictated plenty of things about our lives - where we've lived, how much time we've had available to spend together, how much debt we've had to start our adulthood with. And there have certainly been days or weeks that I've been not so happy about being married to the process, when the words "I hate residency" have crossed my lips.

But I'll say being married to Peter definitely is all it's cracked up to be. Despite any crazy things that medical school and residency bring, this is our life, and we're happy in it because we're together. Perhaps I'll see some of those stereotypical doctor's wife "perks" eventually (and also free ear tubes if my someday children ever need them?), but I'm happiest with the perk of having a husband who enjoys the career he's picked, and whose favorite thing to do with his time off is go on vacation with me. I guess wouldn't mind also being awarded some kind of MD-in-law though, after all the random medical knowledge I've learned and helped pay for...

Happy anniversary, sweetie. Looking forward to many more great years, in residency and beyond.

wedding day | medical school graduation day | first summer in Cincinnati for residency

p.s. sharing on the Medical Mondays blog hop hosted today by my new favorite site, Medicine: A Love Story.

weekend: the final countdown

We've hit another very exciting milestone in residency: the last of the Saturday call shifts. Last year at Thanksgiving was the start of Peter's solo calls as a 2nd year resident - and ever since then, we've been looking forward to this Thanksgiving, when the call schedule greatly improves for him as a 3rd year. Being done with Saturday call was the big light at the end of the tunnel, and now we're there! He's now down to approximately 1 weekend call shift per month and no more of those 28+ hour Saturday ones after this weekend's. (Those poor current 2nd years now get the brunt of things in the call schedule, including Thanksgiving & Christmas, both of which Peter worked last year. Yay for us this year!)

To be honest, the more I've settled in to living in Cincinnati, the less I've minded the Saturdays. The days don't feel quite as long when I've got things to do and friends to see. But of course it's much nicer for me to have him around and much nicer for him to not have to work so much, so we're excited.

While Peter was gone all day and night on his last Saturday, I had lots to do around the house, including painting the kitchen walls (we're getting there on the remodel...), running, dog walking, laundry and other cleaning - and then after all of that I rewarded myself with the evening's entertainment: a little trip to wander around the mall followed by a big ol' glass of wine and watching the most recent BBC version of Emma.

how do I love thee: VA rotation

At the beginning of October Peter started a three-month rotation at the VA hospital. While it's not always his favorite place to work in terms of some of the setup and staff, it's pretty much always my favorite for one big reason: the schedule. Much of their time is spent in clinic, rather than the operating room, and they don't always have patients to round on, so that means having much closer to regular person office hours.* Yay. My love of the schedule is summed up by all of these perks:

1. earlier dinners: more clinic days and fewer patients staying in the hospital means arriving home at more normal people dinner time, which makes me happy (and less hungry). And sometimes Peter even does the cooking, like his special pasta dish.

2. lazy Friday mornings: usually Fridays have only afternoon clinic, so if there aren't any patients to round on in the morning, it means sleeping later (maybe even 7am!) and eating breakfast together. Like on this day when I sat on the counter while Peter made us pancakes.

3. actual holidays: residency schedules generally don't respect regular people days off, like the weekend or holidays, but at the VA, there aren't scheduled clinics/surgeries on federal holidays... And this three-month block is the best for those - Columbus Day, Veteran's Day, Thanksgiving, Christmas (I mean, I don't even get those first two off!). We pretty much always celebrate a bonus day off with breakfast out.

4. help around the house: less time spent at work equals more time at the house; this timing worked out perfectly for the kitchen cabinet painting, thank goodness, since Peter was around enough to help me with half of this ginormous project (and was very good about offering to do so after my little "I hate painting" meltdown early on).

5. a walking companion: more time at home also equals more joining Ginger and me for walks (plus he even scoops the poop... now that's true love).


*lest you think that he's getting off too easy, there are still enough weekend call shifts and VA home call duties (read: occasional pager in the middle of the night - the worst part of the VA, in my opinion...) and required lectures/reading/courses that add up to still working a plenty long work week. But there's most definitely more free time and sleep than regular residency work weeks, so we'll take it.

making it through residency: night float

If you live with a resident, you're bound to experience the night shift at some point(s)... In Peter's program everyone takes one month straight of nights each year; it can be a bit tough since it means he's gone Sunday through Thursday nights and then arrives home and goes to sleep just as I'm getting out of bed - it puts us on completely opposite schedules for a month, including on weekends when he's home, plus the weird hours just start to take their toll on him after a few weeks. And switching back to a normal schedule is a bit of a mess for a few weeks afterward.

(I should add though, on the bright side, that doing the nights all at once means no week night call shifts the rest of the year, plus it's not quite so bad with my work-from-home schedule - we actually do get to see each other a little bit since I can move my office to the living room or take a break during the couple of afternoon waking hours when Peter's home.)

We're nearly done with half of this year's night float month already; by this point, midway through the third one of residency, here are some coping strategies I've developed:

1. Pick a project: home alone weeknights fly by when you have a big project to tackle. Last time I spent the month on reconceptualizing and redesigning my blog; this time I'm working on gathering options for and making decisions on some kitchen updates we want to do. And I have a little list of blog tweaks as well. Lots to do!

2. Get out of town: alternatively, you can just skip the home alone nights. The first two night float months I had work travel and also used them as a good chance to go visit my family and hang out with my mom for a week.

3. Find meals that reheat well: in addition to opposite sleeping schedules, we're on totally different eating schedules, which can be a bit of a pain. (I'm not sure what to call Peter's meal - it's dinner food, eaten soon after he wakes up, at a time closest to the lunch hour. Blinner?) So to make things easier, I try to cook something that yields a bunch of servings and tastes just as good reheated so that we can eat it at our respective mealtimes throughout the week, and something that's easy to put together for him in the middle of my workday. Crockpot recipes like this are my friend here.

4. Have a good attitude: I did a bad job with this the first time around (granted, that schedule was worse, because Peter had to work all day Sundays in addition to the overnights). But as with anything, you've got to find the good parts to appreciate: Peter has every Friday and Saturday night off for a month, which never happens. And I also like knowing his schedule, rather than wondering every day what time he might be home for dinner - so I can plan my evenings, whether I want to go out with friends, eat at 5pm if I'm hungry, watch three episodes of Downton Abbey in a row.

5. Turn on a fan: white noise helps block any of those little noises that freak you out when you're sleeping alone at night...

6. When all else fails: have a TV marathon. I have so much built up on the DVR, what with all the Olympics and US Open tennis watching and the traveling going on in the last month, that I've practically been too busy to hang out with Peter in the evenings anyway. TV shows on Netflix I have worked my way through on other night float months: Downton Abbey, The Good Wife, In Plain Sight.

milestones and making it through residency

Look who's turning 28 today! My sweet, funny, hard-working husband...

This isn't the only milestone we're celebrating around here lately - as of July 1, Peter officially became a third-year resident, which means two years complete, three to go! It's exciting to be making progress through this stage in the becoming-a-doctor process, and I'm so proud of his hard work and smarts (though I still can't quite wrap my mind around the fact that he now actually spends his days operating on people). It's especially exciting to be moving on to the third year because the hours will start improving - within a few months he'll be down to about one weekend per month instead of three and will have no more of the dreaded Saturday (28+ hour) call shifts after Thanksgiving. We are both seriously looking forward to this.

Erica recently posted a great advice/survival guide on "So Your Spouse Is Going to Grad School," and after being married through medical school and two years of residency, I absolutely agree with all of her points: (1) it will end: this stage isn't forever, and soon enough you'll be wondering where the years have gone; (2) carpe diem: don't just put your life on hold because of the busy study schedule or the mounting student loans; enjoy the now, invest in where you live, and make the most of every stage in life; (3) support study time: it is your spouse's job to study, after all, and it will all pay off eventually; (4) pitch a fit: when there are times you feel low on the priority list, say something (realizing he would rather spend time with you than have to study!); carve out a little together time when you need it, even if it's just sharing a table at the coffee shop while he reads; (5) do your own thing: enjoy developing your own hobbies and interests, be independent, and (if still pre-kids) revel in setting your own agenda.

After the last couple of years though, I also have a few key pieces of advice to add when it comes to residency:

not noted below but learned quickly: residents have the ability to fall asleep anywhere | we have so many scrubs around here they end up on our dog

1. Clear a space in your wardrobe - because you're quickly going to accumulate an entire drawer's worth of scrubs. I'm pretty sure the residents are allowed to have only one or two sets out at a time, but Peter's got four or five from both of the hospitals he works at.

2. Manage expectations - there are things I truly love and enjoy about this stage in our lives (finally having dual incomes + a bevy of restaurants to try in a new city = awesome, for starters!), and living through residency as a spouse really is not that bad, partly because it's your life, and you just do it. But my view of the whole thing has probably been helped by going in with low expectations. That might sound really negative, but it's made me all-around happier. When he started residency, I expected to never see Peter, so it was just a huge bonus when he immediately had that first 4th of July weekend off. I expected to be sleeping alone a lot of nights, which does happen sometimes, but in reality we go to bed at the same time almost every night, which I think is great (and almost never happened during medical school). It's all in your perspective.

2b. Avoid disappointment - along those lines, though, it is a demanding schedule, and a resident's time really is not his own. Unfortunately he doesn't get to leave the hospital just because it's 7pm and he's been there 14 hours and it's your birthday, and it helps to remember that and plan accordingly - set your birthday celebration for a day he has off and avoid the disappointment altogether. This type of expectation setting has saved me some feeling sorry for myself. (Also, avoid "I'll be leaving the hospital soon" conversations; instead opt to receive an "I'm walking to the car" notification at the end of the day, which tends to work out much better for your dinnertime expectations...)

3.  Find a community - starting residency usually involves moving to a brand new city, and that's an even harder transition when you have a spouse who spends most of his/her time at the hospital. So find yourself a good community for support. It took me a little while to develop this, but one place to start is if the residency program/hospital has a group for spouses - I joined the Resident Spouse Association here, and it's a great way to meet people who know exactly what you're going through.

4. Develop a strong stomach - after four years of medical school I'd already learned pretty well to stomach hearing stories of blood and guts and needles at the dinner table, a necessary skill during residency too. But then a new sources of queasiness: iPhone photos of various ("cool") things Peter has stitched up that occasionally pop up when I open iPhoto on our computer. Blech. (Note that I have kindly spared you these amongst my sample photos...)

5. Use vacation time well - this was some of the best pre-residency advice we received. Even though you're going to have all kinds of student loans and to think about, use vacation weeks to get away and reconnect. It also helps both of you during a particularly tough stretch to have something to look forward to. Go somewhere relaxing. Catch up on each other (and sleep).

Here's an example of a getaway... Reconnect | Relax

Bottom line my encouragement is that it can be tough at times, but still life is good. Have fun. Enjoy each stage in life. Whine about it when you need to, but don't work too hard on wishing time away, because it's way too good at flying by on its own.

pin to present, round 4

A little something different for this installment of turning a pin into reality: making use of one of the many fabulous color inspirations I've pinned - in another blog makeover.

inspiration photo by Sarah Rhoads Photographers as seen on Style Me Pretty | repinned from Meg
 

This year I've been going to dinner outings and book clubs with the Resident Spouse Association, a support/social group for fellow residency spouses and a ready-made place to find new friends in a new city, plus ones who completely understand the craziness of this stage of life.

The person who used to host a website for the group moved away, so they started a blog in its place - and I got to personalize it from the generic template. We didn't have any kind of logo, so I started by finding a free-use silhouette of the Cincinnati skyline to create an identity, but then I was stumped about where to go with colors... And that's where the pinspiration came in. I love the colors in this photo, fun and vibrant but not too girly (which I sometimes have a tendency toward), plus two of them are in the hospitals' logos so quite fitting!

five things Friday: day off edition

Peter is currently coming off a 20-day stretch with no full day off... And by the end of this week, I think we've both pretty much reached our breaking points. Everyone needs a day off of course, but people who work that many days in a row of getting up really early and working really long hours and having little to no personal time seriously need a day off more often than that. I come out much better in this scenario of course, having worked normal work-from-home person hours that leave plenty of time to enjoy book clubs, outings with friends, lots of sunshine and exercise, etc. in the past few weeks, but even though I've had plenty to entertain myself with, having a spouse gone that many hours gets quite wearing. And I start to get whiny about not getting to go out to dinner together and sit on patios in the warm weather like other people. And complain about having to be in charge of dog walking. Every. Day. (And write blog posts moaning and groaning about it all.)

  I'm not the only one who misses Peter when he has to work this much!

Thus we've been very much looking forward to this full Saturday off (sad to say it's back to the hospital bright and early on Sunday) and a chance to just do normal married people without kids Saturday things together. So this Friday, the top 5 priorities for our Saturday:

1. Sleeping in: not hard to do for someone who gets up well before 6 every day
2. Going out for breakfast: our most favorite day off activity
3. Taking walks with Ginger: it's more fun together - when Peter holds the leash!
4. Catching up on the DVR: it'll be comedy night around here with Modern Family and 30 Rock
5. Working on the yard: starting some spring cleanup, also more fun together

Happy weekend!

in residence

After spending the first month of 2012 blabbing on about The Happiness Project and all the things it was going to inspire me to implement in life... I decided it was time to finally get on that. I'm starting with follow through (how apt) - and one way to increase satisfaction/happiness in this category is to tackle to do list items that make me feel guilty or stressed each time I remember that I really should take care of them.

A major task that has been on my nagging to do list for months: a blog makeover. It's been time for a new look and a new title better reflecting our current life - and better representing me - but that requires thinking. And making decisions. And attempting to conquer web design things that alternately terrify and greatly frustrate me.

Finally, though, after a week of brainstorming with my mom and then a week of fiddling with buttons and fonts, I'm ready to introduce In Residence. Obviously it reflects that we've moved on from the medical school to the residency phase, but it also reflects my new work-from-home life, my longstanding homebody-ness, and my status as everything from chef and housekeeper in residence to book critic and fashionista in residence around here (somebody's got to take care of business - and pleasure! - while the other somebody is busy working so much).

The days can sometimes feel long while Peter's off at the hospital, but I try to appreciate the things we do get to do together even more, and I try to make the most of the time I have during this stage to be independent, pursue my interests, make new friends, and enjoy our current city. That's what I've been blogging about all along, but now it'll all be a little nicer looking and better titled and organized.

Thanks for reading along!

doctor dog

These are kind of old, but I just had to enter exhibit B into the record proving that Ginger is the most tolerant dog ever (see exhibit A).

She puts up very well with a certain someone... I'm currently en route to Japan and will be missing both of them & their antics.

summer fun list

If you haven't noticed yet, I kind of love goal setting and lists. Writing lists of things makes me feel wonderfully in control, and crossing things off them gives me a vastly greater feeling of accomplishment than just doing the thing. (Also, I get to use my colorful sharpies for these things, which doesn't hurt.) I thought a summer fun list would be a good way to keep track of all the things I've been meaning to do around town (now that we've been here a full year already!) and to take full advantage of the warm months.

That all sounds like fun stuff though, and my love of lists sounds more about my neuroses... so I admit this summer list actually has another purpose: calming me a bit about year two of residency. We've been hearing over and over that year two is so much harder than year one (which was no cake walk) - and with year two starting in less than a month, I'm starting to get a bit anxious about the whole thing. It's not my favorite to think about having a hubby who's overworked, worn out, on call practically every weekend (it'll be 3 weekend calls per month next year...), and still needs to find time to read medical-y stuff on top of that.

So: a list of some fun things to make the most of our time together, and some other things for me to look forward to when I need to occupy myself.

Thought I'd better whip up a summer reading list too, since I've got a super long plane ride coming up for my work conference in Japan, followed by some time at the beach:

quality vs quantity

Peter had to take two weekend calls this month, and unfortunately he got stuck with Saturdays for both of them. (Saturday being the worst because you get up at the crack of dawn, work all day, work all night, come home mid to late morning on Sunday, and then sleep. So much for a day off.) While I was home alone, I decided I really had no excuse to avoid spring cleaning any more, so I spent the day doing that and then watched all 235 minutes of the BBC adaptation of Trollope's He Knew He Was Right (most excellent, by the way).

I'm pretty darn good at entertaining myself and do like my alone time, but these practically-whole-weekend shifts are one of the things that can make being married to a resident hard - and this one was a little more tough because it meant going to church by myself on Easter.

But then after I woke Peter up (he likes that; I'm so much nicer than a rude alarm clock awakening) we had a lovely Sunday afternoon together, not doing much of anything aside from lounging around the living room except a walk with Ginger and some dinner (wait, that happened in the living room too).

Of course more of a weekend to spend together would have been nice - especially for poor Peter for whom no weekend day off means 12 days in a row of waking before 5am - but that's reality. It's much nicer to dwell on enjoying the time we do have together and appreciating it in all our introverted boring homebody glory. His schedule can sometimes be the pits, but I wouldn't trade my hubby and his doctorly self for the world.

(Oh - can't have a post without photos - since I made Easter baskets, I had to fill them.....)

Easter

About two days later... Ginger's "candy" devoured sooner than Peter's - shocking

the other side

Today is Match Day. Which means it's been a full year since Peter's Match Day. It's so weird to think that a year ago, we were still in our apartment in Okemos, with no clue of where we'd be living for the next 5 years. I'm sure I was very busy trying to stay calm... there were 10 places on Peter's list, some of which we were more excited than others at the prospect of living in, and some of which Peter was more excited about working at than others - and we really had NO IDEA which one he'd end up with.
It really is a strange thing to be handed an envelope in late March and know that whatever city's listed inside, you need to move there within about 3 months. It's also strange to think about how stressful I found that whole process, now that we're all settled nicely into our new city and new house. It's turned out to be a great location with plenty to do, close enough to MI that I can drive there on my own for visits, and all in all a pretty temperate winter, which I appreciate! And Peter gets along so well with the other interns, and I think he's going to like the program a lot. It all turned out.But I can't believe it's been a year already. Peter and his fellow interns are excited about getting their new recruits; it means they're almost done with year one - year two actually sounds like it's going to be a lot harder, but they won't be on the bottom any more! There's a student from MSU who Peter's pulling for to match here, so it will be kind of fun to find out what happens.

And wow, am I glad to be on this side of Match Day.